Grapes

        I don't like grapes, at least I didn't when I was younger. I didn't care if the grape was green or purple, they were disgusting. Once I had to eat x number of grapes, and it didn't go well, I ended up flushing the grapes down the toilet. I might like grapes now but I really don't wan't to try. I come to think of it, grapes are like mini green and purple eggs. What if one day I wake up in the morning and decide to make an omelette and there's no eggs in the refrigerator, so I take out some grapes and start cracking them open and put the grape yolk into a bowl, add some milk and take out an egg beater ( grape beater now ) and start beating. Mean while I put some olive oil on a pan and start to heat the pan up. I pour my grape and milk mix into the pan and it starts cooking, I sprinkle a little cheese on my future omelette. Then I take a spatula and make sure the edges aren't sticking to the sides of the pan. When my grape and cheese omelette is ready I slide it on to my plate, sprinkle a little cheese on the top and boom. I have made a grape omelette, I start to cut my knife into my breakfast and the knife gets stuck in the grape abomination. Why, because maybe grapes, milk, cheese and olive oil all cooked together in a pan make glue? Or grapes are terrible terrible things that ruin the world.

The Dark Side has a New Face

      I'm a huge Star Wars fan. The next movie, The Force Awakens comes out in December  ( Christmas has a new face ) as you should know if your a Star Wars fan. I'm so excited to see that movie. The new lightsaber with the two mini lightsabers sticking out of the sides, what's that about. Should I scream like a little fan girl meeting Justin Bieber ( I like to call him, Just a Beaver ) and think that's the coolest thing ever, or is it going to turn out to be really lame, or will it be "Da' Bomb" because Star Wars is awesome. When I was little I used to call Darth Vader, Dark Vader, because, what on earth is a Darth? Maybe it is some slang that originated from Vaders' friends and it caught on. It started out as "Vader is Darth" and then he started calling himself Darth Vader. Maybe he just liked the sound of Darth and who ever didn't call him that would get force choked. I had no idea Harrison Ford ( Han Solo and Indiana Jones ) was an older guy with grey hair, no offense Harrison Ford. Here's a link to many Star Wars The Force Awakens trailers. And here's a video of all seven Star Wars movie trailers.
 

Colors

            My favorite color is fuchsia, the pink and purple color. I like all the other colors, except for brown, unless it's with pink, that looks good. Otherwise I don't like brown no offense, if colors have feelings, but there's to many disgusting things that are brown. I'm not a fan of the Halloween Colors purple and orange, it's just revolting in its own special way. I'm not like the Color Police, I'm made up of opinions, and fun facts about cows and clowns.* I don't see many colors in the rainbow than I think I should be able to. Guys can like pink, or purple and all those colors, my friend likes hot pink witch I also like.



* Poll on the right.

Hi There World

     My name's Bob, I work at a coffee shop in downtown England. My boss, Heavy Henry, is very serious about everything. My dog, Spot is a Dalmatian that likes to eat big bowls of kibble. My mother lives in a house made of cardboard behind the coffee shop. My father scoots around England all day on a scooter, then comes back and lives with my mother. The Queen is always trying to lick her elbow until the Royal Guards come take her to her throne. My Doctor has two diseases. I think my brother was on America's most wanted, twice. My girlfriend's a cop and she has another boyfriend that's not me. I think my neighbors just poisoned my pork chops. I'm hosting a dinner party and all my guests have flatulence problems. And last but not least, I'm at nuclear war with North Korea, and I only have three more bombs left.

Arrow

      I am fan of the TV show Arrow. It follows the DC Comics character the Green Arrow, and guess what, he's an archer. Of course some things are different in the show than the comics, I've never read any Green Arrow comics but I approve this message. I don't know if in the comics Oliver Queen ( The Arrow, also known as the hood and the vigilante in the show ) lives in Starling City, or if he was stranded on a chinese island for five years, ( don't worry, I'm not spoiling any thing ) or if he has a sister and he and his family are billionaires. I recommend this show, but not for five year olds. Netflix has three seasons of Arrow and I've only seen two, because the third season just came out and now I'm watching The Flash, which crosses with Arrow. But I'm going to finish The Flash before I watch the third season of Arrow.

   The Flash follows the DC character The Flash, the fastest man alive. I've only seen a couple episodes and both me and my dad think that Arrow is better than The Flash, but it could get better. There was a DC comic where the Flash raced Superman and the ending was stupid, guess who won, it was a tie. If Flash is going to be the fastest man alive, you would think he would beat Superman, wouldn't you?

Halloween

          I don't know what I'm going the be for Halloween, and there's a little over three weeks until I go candy hunting. I think I might be a :

• Dog on a Unicycle
• Dog
• A Rain Cloud
• Stay Puft Marshmallow Man
• A Tree
• A Shoe 
• Soccer Player Robert Lewandowski

   I want to be something mobile so I can get more candy faster, and who ever I go           Trick or Treating with, I  hope they're mobile to. I saw Ghostbusters over a year and a 1/2 ago, and I was sad I didn't know what the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man.   

Santa's Opinion on Cookies

                 It was the night before christmas, and the very early morning of christmas too, when I eat many cookies, some are good, some are bad, some make me have to use the little boys room and then I have to look around the house I'm in for a toilet plunger. I like the shapes of cookies, some families actually have enough skill to shape and bake good cookies. Notice how I didn't say shake and bake there, that would be weird, if you are laughing right  now you should consider yourself on the naughty list. My apologies I shouldn't even have mentioned shaking and baking. I like chocolate chip cookies a lot but I must confess, I LOVE SNICKER DOODLES !!!!!! Sorry. White chocolate is a big mistake, I will crumple a cookie into crumbs so it looks like I ate them, then I will dispose of the others. I can't have baking powder. Never add to much sugar to a recipe, and never, NEVER bake or buy me Fortune Cookies, they taste terrible and the fortunes make fun of me. One fortune I got said You will get coal from Santa Clause, another said Don't eat this cookie unless you want to change your Santa Suit from size XXXL to XXXXL. But do you know what would make my christmas, Girl Scout Cookies!!! They are the best, except for Savannah Smiles, they got those to replace Lemon Chalet Cremes which everybody loved. So if you can get some of those that would be awesome. 

       Now, I would like to discuss milk with you, I have mixed feelings about 2% and skim. Skim tastes terrible and 2% tastes so good, but 2% has 2% of the fat left in the milk, and skim doesn't. I'm trying to lose a few pounds, I think I might run a marathon. Almond milk is a big yes. I always enjoy a nice cup of almond milk. I'm allergic to honey, so don't get any ideas. If any attempts are made on my life you will be naughty for life, yes, believe it, there's a bounty on my head, and that find Santa App didn't help either. Can you believe the military has been tracking my credit card? Me either. 

       The Reindeer do not like apple cores believe it or not carrots or full apples are preferred, Rudolph is allergic to strawberry tops, we learned that the hard way. 



NOTE: I'm am sorry if I offended Santa.

NOTE: No reindeer were harmed in the process of making this blog post.